Nobody Cares…

“Depression is being colorblind and constantly told how colorful the world is.”

~Atticus~

Hi. I’m Depression.

I mean…Hi, I’m depressed.

Life sucks, you know? It’s miserable.

I didn’t want to get out of bed. I knew if I got out of bed, I had to deal with the real world.

It’s sunny out. It’s too bright. Too cheerful.

I just want to cry. I hate being alone.

All alone.

I am just so, so, so tired…

That’s so true. I saw a dark forest. The sunlight was hidden by the canopy of the trees. It was quiet; forebodingly quiet. The trees, they looked like they were crying. In the distance, an owl hooted. And it sounded like someone was laughing at me.

I am so, so, so tired.

I think I will go take a nap. Go sleep all day. Yeah, that’s what I’ll do.

Hi. I am depressed.

But I have to put a smile on my face. Or mom will be sad. Or my family will be sad.

The weight of the world.

It’s too heavy on my shoulders.

I just want to escape. Run away. And be lost. Forever.

Hi. I am Depression.

And I am just so, so, so, tired.

Yeah, I think I’ll just go back to sleep…

Uh oh. Gotta go. Bye!


Oh my GAD! I am so, so, so, SORRY! Oh, right, you are probably confused. You see, that wasn’t really me. I mean, it was me, but it wasn’t! Not really.

……….

Sighssssss. Let me start over. I had another…visitor. I guess his name is Depression. Judging by where he’s at right now, slouched down over there in the corner, I daresay that’s his name. But yeah, he, umm, got ahold of my keyboard, and umm, decided to make a go of this. But rather than deleting all of it, I decided to, umm, keep it here.

So, yeah, that was me. But in a very real sense, it’s not me either. And I’ll tell you why. Just like he said, in the REAL world, I smile, I keep a positive attitude, and I live my life the best I can. Every single day.

But Depression is real, folks. He’s lurking somewhere in the corner of our minds, ready to come out at a moment’s notice. He creeps up, and takes over our minds, and makes us think all the thoughts that are not ideal for living in such a difficult world that we all live in. Oh yes, Depression is so, so real.

But my positive attitude is so zen too.

I like to call it Mind over Matter. Once upon a time, in an office far, far away, I learned all about CBT. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. At it’s most basic form, it’s changing the way you think. Just like that. So when these dark, insidious thoughts start to creep in, I change the way I think. Or I try to anyway.

Do I feel miserable? Sure! IF I allowed myself that luxury. I keep myself busy, constantly, so it doesn’t happen. Do I sometimes stay in bed later in the morning? Yup. But then, I get out of bed, and I go about my day like any other sane human being. I make plans. I live my life. Step by step.

I look outside my window, and I see sunshine. I see butterflies. I see a world full of golden color and vibrant hues. I see living, breathing human beings who all have their own little problems. Just like us.

But I don’t let Depression run my life. I control it the only way I know how. With the help of medication, with some self-love, and a circle of support, I learned how to control my inner demons. And I have never felt so free as I have when I finally conquered Depression. But make no mistake, he always lurks around.

Everyone has different coping techniques. Find yours. Battle your demons. And live your life. You have earned it.

I hear a sob in the corner, but it was a sob of happiness. Of gratitude. I turned around to look at Depression, who was wiping his eyes free of the tears that streamed down his face. He waved, as if in relief, and then vanished into thin air.

Well, he’ll come back again, I’m sure of it. But guess what? I’m ready for him!


Did you know that…

Depression in the United States…

  • Affects over 18 million adults (one in ten) in any given year.
  • Is the leading cause of disability for ages 15-44.
  • Is the primary reason why someone dies of suicide about every 12 minutes. – over 41,000 people a year.
  • In comparison : homicide claims less than 16,000 lives each year, according to 2013 CDC statistics.

Depression in the Workplace…

  • Causes 490 disability days from work each year in the U.S.
  • Accounts for $23 billion in lost workdays each year.
  • Takes an economic toll over $100 billion each year from U.S business.

Suicide…

  • Was the tenth leading cause of death for all ages in 2013.
  • Results in the death of four times as many men as women, and represent 77.9% of all suicides.
  • Is the second leading cause of death among persons aged 15-34 years, and the third leading cause of death among persons aged 10-14.
  • Every day, approximately 110 Americans take their own life, and roughly 3,500 attempt to do so.

And I could go on, but I won’t. Don’t be a statistic. Read back on this blog, and then ask yourself :

Did it sound morbid? Depressing? Dark?

Then read the second part of this blog. Then ask yourself :

Did it sound more upbeat? More positive?

How did you feel when you read both parts of the blog? Dark…then better, perhaps?

It’s normal. Negativity can lead to depression. There’s FAR too much negativity in our world. We can’t stop that, and we never will. What we CAN change, though, is ourselves.

Be positive. You come first.

Don’t be a statistic.

3 thoughts on “Nobody Cares…

  1. That picture of the monster looming over the person really depicts how things are in just that simple way. You describe depression well, and I can see you have a sense of humor, which I hope is a sign of your winning the battle. I also like how you said CBT has helped you change the way you think. That’s what is so important in fighting this battle–getting your thought process out of the horrible rut that it travels in. I personally did a lot of talk therapy in which my therapist challenged me on everything I said which helped me realize the insidious lies I was telling myself, and we also did a type of therapy called EMDR (eye movement desensitization reprocessing), which is sort of new but has proven results.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. This is wonderful news! I’m glad that you found it helpful and informative. CBT works very well, but I have learned that not everything works for everyone, so I just encourage people to get help however they can. I never tried EMDR, but I’ve heard things about it and positive things. I am super happy that it works for you! Thank you for the good thoughts too!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Yes, you’re right to encourage people to get help. I’ve taken meds in the past, but it’s getting that focused help from another person (a professional) which has made the difference for me personally.

        Like

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